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Naughty Doggy

Illustration for article titled Naughty Doggy

Disclaimer: This is not my dog.

Dogs have no concept of incriminating evidence.

FluterDog is not allowed in the extra bathroom, because the extra bathroom is where we keep the cat stuff. The cat stuff includes the litter-box. Sh*tty K*tty isn't super fond of FluterDog under the best of circumstances (I just watched her wag her tail against his head for a solid two minutes, so while I don't agree, I can understand where he might get the idea she was y'know ... bad ... or painful). So he has his little Cat Sanctuary and we don't have to deal with gravel-feet when we get out of the shower, (Just if both of us want to use the restroom at the same time.) or put his box on the carpeted floor.

FluterDog is not allowed in the extra bathroom, but she can be crafty when she wants to, and apparently Cat Biscuits are worth a little law breakin'.

She always goes straight from the Biscuit Box to her water bowl to rinse out her mouth. It's important to note that, not unlike the avatar dog, FluterDog has a beard. A long, luxurious, red beard - which often becomes soaked with water when she drinks, open-mouthed, like the Simple Dog she truly is.

Open-mouthed beard soaking plus kitty litter clay dust = a grey-faced dog with a hardened, clay-coated beard. She runs to greet me at the door with her happy dance, per usual, and acts surprised when we start to get mad.


"BAD DOG!" causes her to look left and right, like, "What? Is there a bad dog here? Where is he? I will shake my head disapprovingly."

Your beard is grey and caked-up; you are a shit-eating doggy.
Please serve this dog a guilty sentence.

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