One of my new messages, verbatim:

het there darlin baby want to go out to the rodeo or eat some ice cream or something fun like that? or waffle house or demolition derby’ or fishing

Well, as you can imagine, my panties just flew right off. He clearly read my entire profile and saw words like “Shakespeare” and “Paris” and decided, this is the woman for me, and I’m the man for her.

(Seriously, do these guys read anything at all? I’m not hot, so it’s not like my pictures are drawing them in. But at least this one gave me a laugh.)