First things first: Did you know that you can browse OKC anonymously even if you don't have A-list? I did not know this until misseleneous told me on Twitter yesterday and my mind has been blown. You can't see who has visited you, but you also don't show up as having visited other people. You just have to go into your settings to turn it on. WITCHCRAFT.

Also, I've changed my OKC picture from one of me in the snow (which seems no longer appropriate) to one of me wearing eyeball earrings. I'm a big fan of airing your weird quirks (like a love of eyeball jewelry) early in the relationship.

Now, on to this week's happenings.

#9

Apparently it doesn't matter that I couldn't come up with a good nickname for last week's Date #9. After not hearing from him all week, I finally shot him a "hey, how've you been?" text on Thursday evening. Nothing.

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I spent most of Thursday night and Friday morning pissed off that two guys in a row had decided to ghost on me, because that's some fucking bullshit. And then on Friday afternoon, I finally got a response: "Sorry, good but busy, you?"

Well. Better than ghosting, I suppose, but not by much. Still, I liked the guy, so I responded and then asked if he was up for getting together this weekend.

Him: I can't do anything this weekend but perhaps next week

Me: Next week would probably work. Be honest here: Are you actually interested in seeing me again, or are you trying to do a slow fade?

Him: I actually can't do anything this weekend but to be up front I think I'm not ready to jump into anything currently. You're great, just decided I'm not looking for anything currently.

Me: No worries. I'd rather hear that straight than have you just disappear.

Him: Cool, apologies for the slow response, was actually running around a lot this week

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Cool.

That is a chill rejection if ever I've seen one. (I really love that article, so get used to me using it constantly and complaining about chillness for the foreseeable future.) It smells like bullshit, but whatever.

I'm bummed because I was pretty into him, but if he's going to be like that, he's not worth my time.

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The Brit

Brit Quote of the Week:

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And he wonders why I assume everything he says is a setup for a terrible joke. (Because it is.)

Fun With Quickmatch

I've been pretty lazy about OKC-ing recently, so after all of this went down with #9, I got myself some wine and set out to get back in the game. OKC has a feature called Quickmatch, which is kind of like a cross between OKC and Tindr—you see the main page of their profile and their photos (but none of their questions) and you can either like or pass. If you like each other, it sends you both a message saying as much. I hadn't used it before because I was hesitant to "like" someone without being able to look at their complete profile, but it's certainly simpler than going through a billion profiles one by one so I decided to give it a shot.

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Being me, I live-tweeted this whole thing. The best way to experience it is to just scroll through my twitter—I did a little bit on Saturday morning, but the majority was on Friday night. Here are some highlights:

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I've had a dozen or so mutual likes so far. (Plus one mutual like that happened when I accidentally hit the wrong button, whoops.) I've gotten messages from four of those, including the incredibly hipster guy I only liked because a date with him could be really entertaining. ("What I'm doing with my life: Working on my zine.") One turned out to be totally wrong for me—I think we had about 9 pages of questions where one or both had marked the other person's answer as unacceptable. Another is actually trying to have a decent conversation with me, though, so we'll see how that goes. (Downside: He's the same height as me, and I am not very tall. Seems good-looking otherwise, though, so worth a shot.) (Freudian typo there: "worth a short.")

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The Rest

I got my first proper neg!

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And then I did a real-life emoticon shrug and blocked his ass.

"Netflix and dank"??? I do like "carfax for people," though, even if it doesn't really make any sense. (Not responding, though. 55% match + immediately asked me out—or in, rather— = bad idea.)

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Here I am! Go away now please.

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My weekend is great! Full of doing things that don't involve interacting with you, because you're 32 and you seem terrible.

Thanks man, that sounds like a super sincere observation of my character.

Hopefully this coming week of carfaxing will turn up some worthwhile guys. I'll see you next week.