I skipped last week’s entry because I was busy and did basically nothing OKC-related for a week, but I’ve been catching up quite nicely. This week: Exciting news for Team Brit, real life disappoints me once again, and I go on my first real date in a while. And if you missed it, I went through all of my messages and broke down the data on them.

Date #13

Date #13 came about as a result of my quickmatch spree two weeks ago. We were a mutual like, and I sent him a message because we had a lot of similarities in our profile, down to very similar wording in a few spots. He likes Tamora Pierce and scifi, and he spends a lot of time thinking about intersectional feminism. (I know a lot of women hate it when guys call themselves feminists on their profiles. I like it. So sue me.) We had good chemistry in our messages, and we decided to meet for drinks after work last Thursday. We’ll call him Pierce.

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It started off rough—the metro had a bit of a meltdown that afternoon, so he was running really late. He didn’t seem totally comfortable with the place we went, and I figured he was nervous/out of his element, which would explain why even though we had a good conversation, something didn’t quite seem to click. He gave me his number and told me he was putting the decision as to whether or not we saw each other again in my hands.

I liked him enough for a second date, but there was one sticking point: He lives with his parents and brother. Yes, we’ve been here before, with the Mad Scientist. I wasn’t totally comfortable with bringing the Mad Scientist home, and after that I decided I wasn’t going to do it again until after I move at the end of June. There are some differences between Pierce and the Mad Scientist, though, crucially that Pierce is 22 and still in college right near where his family lives, so I can understand why he’d be there. But it’s still a complication. I texted Pierce and told him this. My perspective was that if it can’t go anywhere, why bother; his was that we didn’t even know if we’d get to that point, so we should see how the next few dates go before we get ahead of ourselves. After thinking about it a bit and talking it over with Jess and OneLittleDetail, I finally decided to give him another shot.

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Tuesday we met in a park for a nice casual picnic after I got off work. As we were talking/eating bread and cheese, I realized what’s a little off about him: He has a tendency to respond to everything with sarcasm or a joke. Which I get; I know that’s a problem I have too, especially on dates or other situations where I’m trying to come off as clever and personable but don’t really know the person too well. But it does make it difficult when you want to actually get to know someone. He opened up a bit—more than on our first date, I think—but I was still leaning away from the idea of a third date.

And then he asked if he could kiss me… and I said yes, and he was a really good kisser, and one thing led to another and anyway that’s how I found myself in the world’s best-lit parking garage giving a blowjob in the front seat of his car.

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So yeah. I still don’t think it’s going to go very far, but I’ll probably see him again. I still haven’t figured out the whole logistical thing, and I’m not really a big fan of the idea of continuing to just fool around in his car until I move.

Real Life: Just As Frustrating As OKC

In the interest of fully chronicling my misadventures in romance, let’s take a brief detour into the offline world. On Sunday I went to a cookout with a few friends (who are welcome to identify themselves in the comments). I happened to notice an attractive guy there who was being pretty friendly, but as a group of us were talking, someone offhandedly mentioned that he had a girlfriend. Bummer.

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As the evening went on, however, he was being increasingly flirty with me, and I started to think that maybe the girl who had mentioned his girlfriend was wrong/confused/drunk, which was certainly not out of the question. After a while, a group of us went up to the roof, where we sat and talked and he started feeling up my leg. And then everyone else slowly went back downstairs and, left alone, we started making out.

After a minute or so, I pulled away and said, “So… Did I mishear earlier when someone said you had a girlfriend?”

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To which he responded, “Ehhhhhhhhhh…”

So that was the end of that. I probably should have asked sooner or gotten the hint when one of the other girls told me (in front of him), “Don’t waste your time. He’s a piece of shit.” I had just assumed she meant that he was a sleep-with-you-and-never-text kind of a piece of shit (which I could have dealt with), not that he had a girlfriend (which is not okay).

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The Brit

The Brit had mentioned a while back that he might be visiting some friends in the US this summer, including a friend near DC, but it’d been a month or two since he’d brought it up so I wasn’t sure it was still on the table. Last week, however, he messaged me asking if I’d be in town certain dates in mid-July, and this weekend he booked his plane tickets.

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Don’t get me wrong, he’s not coming just to see me. He’s making three stops along the east coast to visit assorted friends, and even when he’s in DC, he’s planning on doing a trip down to Richmond to visit a friend there. And, well…

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So I’m not fooling myself into thinking this is anything super special. But it’s still exciting that I’m actually going to get to meet him in person, almost six months after he first messaged me.

The Rest

I was messaging a guy who seemed pretty great, and he was giving off plenty of signs that he was into me. Right before this part of the conversation, he said that he had been a little nervous that I wouldn’t respond to his message. At this point, we’d sent four messages total, including his short introductory one. And then…

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It was just such an abrupt turn—he went from seemingly very interested to out in no time at all, just because I didn’t want to give my number to a guy I’d barely even interacted with. (Please note that I also wasn’t saying we had to meet up right away; we could have talked a little longer in messages and then I would have talked to him on the phone.) It was just weird.

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I’m kind of disappointed that I didn’t get a response from this one:

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My profile says to only message me if you’re within my “looking for” age range (21-27). This guy is 19:

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Glad this guy explained in the follow-up message, because I was super confused:

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It doesn’t make up for his short stature and deep passionate love for the ukulele, but this guy gets it:

Hi there! Always good to see someone else who loved Pushing Daisies, a show that all of us who are unable to physically touch Lee Pace connected with on a deep level.

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I’ve also gotten messages from some guys who seem worthwhile, but my new job/life in general has left me without the energy to actually respond to them. Maybe I’ll get to them before next week’s entry.

Programming note: I’m going to be posting these during the week from now on, instead of on Sundays. In theory I’ll have some good downtime at my new job to respond to comments, etc. So far I’ve been spending a lot of time trying to make sense of the crappy records my predecessor left, but once I get my feet under me things should be less hectic.