So, now that it's actually not freezing cold outside, I want to start running outside again. Also, since I have been inundated with work recently and with meeting deadlines and carving out just enough time to go to therapy today, I haven't had a chance to go to the gym. My gym is closing in 20 minutes, and I'm not even dressed. The only thing is, it's dark out now and my husband is away on business. To be honest, I'm a little more scared than I normally would be because there's no one here to be worried if I'm not back in a reasonable amount of time.
Also, last weekend I decided to go for a walk at around 10:30 pm despite my husband voicing his concerns over me being safe and whether that was a good idea. I told him I'd be fine, I'm a grown woman and I can take care of myself. Besides, we live in a safe neighborhood and I'd only be on well-light streets. So, I'm about 10 minutes in and I pass this man on the sidewalk. I debated crossing the street before we actually passed each other's path, but in the end told myself I was being ridiculous and paranoid. Well, wouldn't you know I should have listened to my gut, because this man starts trying to speak with me. I don't reply and pick up my pace a bit. He calls after me. I turn to look while walking in the opposite direction. I think he says something like "love you" but I can't be sure.
So, I continue on my way for a few more minutes before turning around and heading home. Well, of course I cross paths with him again, only this time he is on the opposite side of the street. He calls after me again, asking what my problem is and why won't I say hi. Emboldened by the fact that I notice a police cruiser parked in the Dunkin' Donuts (Boston, hi) behind me and the fact that he was on the opposite side of the street, I finally replied that it was more than a little frightening to have strange men call after you as a woman alone at night. I added, and I'm mad that I even did this, that I'm sure he was well meaning, but that it was frightening all the same. His response. "Aww come off it, get back to me when you grow up." Infuriating. Also infuriating that I felt as though I couldn't even tell my husband about the incident because of the same type of bullshit. I hate feeling as though I have to justify simple decisions like going for a walk. And I hate having my feelings brushed aside so easily because I'm a poor, naive, stupid woman. I'm sick of being treated like a child that needs looking after. I'm sick of not feeling free to do what I please, when I please. Fuck.