So after a week I finally got up the courage to tell my parents about my breakup. I had been putting it off because I wasn't itching to find out what non-supportive thing my mother would think to say. I told her we broke up and asked her not to pry for details or offer advice. Despite this she still told me that "at some point it is worth it to just stay together and never breakup" (read: stay in a bad relationship so that you can get married, which shes knows isn't even a goal of mine), that I really needed to think about the "diminishing options" at my age (read: at the ripe of old age of 27 I have resigned myself to becoming a spinster), and that she felt bad that the past 6 years had been a "wasted investment" (read: all pre-marital relationships are just investments of time into what will hopefully become a marriage). Oh and she asked if the reason we broke up was because he was cheating on me.
I don't feel bad about her reaction. On the contrary, I found it amusing that my mother thinks I'm destined to singledom because of a breakup in my late 20s. I just wonder what it would be like to have one of those mothers who you call when you're sad instead of avoid talking to when you're sad because they say all of the wrong things :/