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We got a phone call earlier today. My female cousin (mother's mother's brother's daughter) called her brother died. He and his gf live next to her in a duplex the sister owns. His gf went to say goodnight to him, they sleep in different bedrooms that may be common for oldsters but not sure, he did not wake up. He was in his late sixties and that day he was jovial and healthy. Actually was very healthy.

Right prior to Thanksgiving he disowned his son for breaking into his home and stealing a few thousand dollars. This was not the first time he disowned him. Every holiday get together he yelled at his son for what he ate telling him loudly "mark my words you will be dead in a year". His son is a heavy drinker, weighs 280 and has childhood diabetes also generally unhealthy and often in the hospital. Also has lost a few toes. His sister who called us is blaming her nephew for this death for the heartache he caused his father.

Yet this was a man who always fought with his son, always attacking him for eating and how he took care if himself also helped get him into detox. A man who essentially raised his grandson who is now in college. I wonder if his son used the grandson as a bargaining chip where the grandson would have ended up?

In a quiet moment one Thanksgiving a few years ago he admitted he did not do a good job raising his son (his wife died when their son was preteen) and still was not yet he saw his grandson as a second chance. I never forgot that. The grandson,s mother took off when he was very young no clue where she is. I suspect the son will be ignored by all at the wake and funeral.