Seriously. It’s not my fault that you have the emotional regulation abilities of a toddler, and that getting your coffee in 2 minutes instead of 90 seconds is enough to send you over the edge into a full blown temper tantrum. You must be pure hell to live with if a slight like this turns you into a sniveling monster.

Working in customer service for so long has taught me that 90% of people are really just overgrown children who have no self management skills at all.