Welcome To The Bitchery
Welcome To The Bitchery

Ok, so the comments on Lindy's big article today are sending me into an apoplectic, near-apocalyptic level of rage. Like, I want to punch the internet — and comments on this site RARELY get to me that much. Maybe I'm a little extra-sensitive because I'm out of my comfort zone right now (and I have a lot of bad memories associated with coastal Carolina), but seriously, this shit is Banana Town.

First, ALL OF THE TROLLS. ALL OF THEM. EVERY ONE. You've got a couple of the usual suspects (BananaStandby and PatriarchyForever make appearances, because of course they do), but then there's this MASSIVE infusion of new trolls I've never seen before. Where the fuck are these cockwombles coming from?! WHERE?! Was this shared on another Gawker network site? I haven't noticed this level of bullshit as much on other Lindy articles, and this one wasn't even about a gender issue! What the fuck is this shit coming from?!

Then, you have all the fucking people saying that "swearing is uncreative." Ok, seriously, go lick an asshole. Just a big ol' smelly asshole. You can't tell me that "doucheschooner" and "fuckbucket of crazy" and "twatnoodle" aren't fun to say and creative. "Durrrr, swearing is uncreative" is what people say when they don't want to admit that swearing hurts their delicate fucking sensibilities. Fuck your sensibilities, get over yourself.

Then, you have that awful ass-rag gingersnap accusing Lindy of being hypocritical because people get upset about fat-shaming on Jezebel, because RIGHT THOSE ARE TOTALLY THE SAME THING I AM GLAD YOU ARE HERE TO POINT THIS OUT YOU HORRIBLE PILE OF RANCID MOOSE TESTICLES. I'd like to note that this is the same commenter who, when Lindy had the audacity to write an article talking about how overweight people are constantly discriminated against, said, "maybe they should put down the fork."

Seriously, fuck everything. YOU GET THE CAT GIF TONIGHT, COMMENTERS.


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