Overall impression:

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Random Thought Number One:

Women in refrigerators women in refrigerators women in refrigerators women in refrigerators women in refrigerators women in refrigerators women in refrigerators women in refrigerators women in refrigerators women in refrigerators women in refrigerators

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Random Thought Number Two:

Is Marc Webb seriously going through with a straightforward, three part origin arc? That is so adorable. No, really. It's quaint. So vintage nineties.

Random Thought Number Three:

Ja, without Emma Stone's and Andrew Garfield's chemistry, this series is pretty much screwed. Hopefully, Marvel Studios does a better job adapting its own property once the rights revert back to it, cuz this ship is going to tank.

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Random Thought Number Four:

Oh hai there Felicity Jones! Hey, did you just say your character's name is Felicia? FELICIA?! O M G. We're FINALLY gonna get to see Black Cat on the big screen! DON'T FUCK THIS UP, MARC WEBB.

Random Thought Number Five:

Why is Aunt May going back to Nursing School to pay for Peter's college tuition? Wouldn't that just mean that she now has TWO tuitions to pay off? Also, why are Gwen and her family eating Dim Sum at night? I thought you could only get Dim Sum in the morning and during lunch. Are there all day Dim Sum places? Why have I not heard of them? I could go for some Dim Sum right now.

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Random Thought Number Six:

I love you Dane DeHaan and I could see you trying really hard to bring us a nuanced, Heath-Ledger-esque portrayal of Harry Osbourne/Green Goblin II, but it just ain't happening.

Random Thought Number Seven:

I really love Dane DeHaan. He's the Hiddles of the Spider-Man franchise. Of course, Andrew Garfield and his big brown cow eyes aren't bad to look at.

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Random Thought Number Eight:

Wouldn't the Spidey franchise be so much better if we kept Peter in high school and he had to juggle his webslinging duties with being a geeky high school kid? In fact, you could treat the whole thing like a sort of Skins/Clueless/Mean Girls meets superheroes kind of thing with Gwen being the Cady Heron to Mary Jane's Regina George. Wouldn't that be totes amaze?