Autostraddle's got a great piece on sexual assault between queer women, and some of it highlights the way our current definitions of rape mean that, legally, some of what Leah's rapist did to her wasn't "rape". And that's fucked up.

When I tell people I was raped by a girl, they ask me: What does that mean?

It means she put her fingers inside me when I didn't want her to. It means she held me down. It means she would grind or trib on me, when I didn't want her to. She went down on me, when I didn't want her to. She had sex with me when I was too drunk to say no, when I said no, and when I was too scared to say anything. She told me it was my fault. And she didn't stop. Not when she quit drinking. Not when she came out to her family. And she didn't stop trying to hurt me, even after we broke up.

Under the FBI's current definition of rape (“the penetration, no matter how slight, of the vagina or anus with any body part or object, or oral penetration by a sex organ of another person, without the consent of the victim"), tribbing is not considered rape. If performing oral sex on Leah without her consent is rape depends entirely on if her rapist penetrated her vagina with her tongue or fingers (or an object), or "just" licked her labia and clit. Ugh, I cannot even IMAGINE having to tell the police, the DA, the judge, and a jury the details of oral sex performed non-consensually on me by another woman, and worry about homophobia and the squick even liberal allies often feel when confronted with queer sex. And if Leah was ever forced to go down on her rapist, that would definitely not be considered rape.

So let's just get clear, right now: It is not any less harmful to be raped by a woman. It is not any less rape when a woman is the rapist. And it should be taken every bit as seriously as when men are rapists.