Particularly on food, not liking food and cooking.
I was sitting eating my dinner, it was perfection, and then I started thinking about something that really pissed me off in my one relationship. I never said anything, because he would cry. Like I had to eat over cooked roast beef after a root canal and he cried because he slaved all day on it and I was super mean.
I was thinking about other times I’ve eaten perfect things and how while eating them my ex would say:
“Oh we could add this to the recipe. OR maybe next time we could use this spice instead of this spice. Oh I added that spice (that you hate) because I think it will be better. I’ve also added 10 times more garlic, and hot sauce. I added more salt too. OH I made my own vinaigrette, I’m sure you’ll like it because it’s home made (I hate all vinaigrettes with the exception of grapefruit) and I’ve covered your salad in it, because I’m sure you’ll like it this time. And I’ve added the only vegetable you hate to the pizza, because you should eat it it’s good! And take a bite of the only fruit you hate too, it’s so weird you hate that.”
DO NOT TOUCH MY FOOD. DO NOT CHANGE PERFECTION. IT DOES NOT NEED TO MODIFIED. DO NOT ADD THING I DON’T LIKE TO MY FOOD I WILL SCREAM AT YOU.
The other big one. It’s not my night to cook. When I cook, I do it all by myself and need no help. He is suppose to cook everything and clean because didn’t have a paying job.
“Could you just be in the kitchen with me. Oh since you are here can you cut those. See it’s not hard cooking? But I need you in the kitchen with me. Can you stir that? Can you get that. See you are such a good SOUS CHEF.”
The reason I don’t want to cook with you, is because I wanted 30 minutes to do anything but work. NO I don’t want to hang out in the kitchen with you. NO I don’t want to help. I WANT TO WATCH TV. When cook I don’t need an audience. SO NO I DON’T WANT TO MORALLY SUPPORT YOU THROUGH CUTTING VEGETABLES. IT’S VEGETABLES YOU CUT THEM! DONE! It does not require hand holding.
I can’t believe (well, it makes sense actually) I never yelled about and just thinking about it is making me so angry.
If I ever date anyone again I will loose it a little if they need me in the kitchen on their night to cook.