I was going to post a post about how I'm all depressed and feeling self-worthless and how our garage sale was a freaking bust and we're stuck with a bunch of my Grandmother-in-law's crap that we'll probably never get rid of because my MIL can't understand that people won't automatically pay what she thinks a thing is worth and that slapping the word "vintage" on crappy Christmas ornaments doesn't increase their value?

On the plus side, we did sell this child's toy, a talking grill that burns the souls of the innocent and cooks up tasty nightmares:

But this is only the second scariest thing in this post.

In the afternoon, after it was all put away and the boys were up from naps, PhMom started complaining about chest pains on her left side. My dad died of a heart attack when I was 18, so I'm real freaked by stuff like this. So we did web check-in with the local doc-in-a-box, and they called and told her to come in right away. I guess that's the one silver lining: when you have symptoms like that, they really don't want you to delay, so your wait times are much shorter.


When she got in to see the Dr. (actually, a PA), she explained that there were three things that could be wrong: heart, lungs, and muscle/bone. They did an EKG; the heart was fine. They did a chest X-Ray; the lungs were fine. So it was apparently some kind of muscle pull that is called Tietze syndrome, which is apparently pronounced (and this is the funny part) "Titsy."

That's right. A guy named Titsy identified a medical condition located directly on the tit. How does stuff like that happen?


Okay, it was funny to me. And I was really glad it wasn't something terrifying.