Hey everyone, remember how I went to a sleep lab a month ago? Where I did lots of sleeping, took many naps, ate more food than anyone should ever eat in a sitting, and then came home only to sleep for 17 hours straight? Well, the results are in!

Turns out I sleep like a damn champ, 6.5 hours total. All of the heavy black bars are me dreaming, and all of the spots where the pink arrows are pointing are points when I had extremely mild apnea - which kind of explains my ability to lucid dream often. I also shift a lot in my sleep, as you can see in the top bar. I mostly sleep on my back, with occasional side sleeping.

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As for the nap study, I was very sleepy. The average person takes about 8.5 minutes to fall asleep for a nap, I beat that by falling asleep at an average of 6 minutes. I don’t dream when I nap, which is good because it rules out narcolepsy. But still, I am super sleepy and the apnea isn’t strong enough to be a full explanation. So the official diagnosis is “Moderate to Excessive Daytime Hypersomnombulence”. Which basically translates to, “Well it’s still not clear why, but yeah you are a physically sleepy lady.”

For now, they want to test me on a CPAP for a month to see if that helps any, but the doctor has a fair amount of skepticism about it working. If that doesn’t work, they may just put me on Amphetamines or Ritalin to keep me awake. My doctor explained it to me and I just responded with, “So I am so sleepy I might actually need uppers?” And yep, that’s exactly it.

As for now, I’m still kind of trying to recover from my meltdown at bankruptcy counseling this morning. So I am very sleepy. It’s time for a nap, at least until my machine is ready or someone gives me a bump of coke (kidding!).