I'm at work and earlier today, I convinced myself that my tampon had leaked. The room was full of people including a cluster of computers by my desk that were all being used, kids and parents milling about getting ready for storytime, and two gentleman sitting almost next to the desk.

The rows of non fiction are right behind the desk I was sitting at and the public bathrooms are right them. I get up and try to walk backwards quickly but not drawing attention. I'm like awkwardly moonwalking out of the room. I get to the public bathroom. At first think someone is in there and I can wait until they are out. Then I realized that they are locked, of course! All of the bathrooms in the branches are locked. The key is at the circulation desk and there is no way I can get there without turning my back to the whole room. I walked sideways along the last row of non fiction (where I found this book today) and quickly duck into the staff area. I'm laughing and cringing. Menstruation stealth moves. The LA at the circ desk was looking at her computer and I'm hoping that she didn't see me. Get to the staff bathroom and it was a false alarm. Phew! I walk back outside and get ready to take my lunch break. As I'm leaving, the LA goes, "Is everything ok?" And I stammer, "Yup! Was looking for a book and then realized I forgot something, hahaha!" COOL AS A CUCUMBER. She smiled, at least? I just relayed this to my best friend and she laughed very hard at me.

Anyway, is it 6 o clock yet?

(Edited to delete the billion times I said so.)