So there's this thing online called a blog, and sometimes it's aimed at straight women and sometimes it's aimed at gay women and as is the case with most other things in life, a lot are aimed at straight men. I happened across a heated facebook debate today about this article, which is clearly aimed only at straight women who don't want to be called stupid lesbians for not wanting to fuck some guy at a bar. Here is the article:
Whatever. How about I say whatever the fuck I want to whomever it is- M/F, S/G/B etc.- who is hitting on me? I feel like the ultimate male privilege is that blogs aimed at cis-males talking about movies, tv, and syria rather than about how they should worry whether every fucking thing they do somehow contributes to the misery of all other men. It's pretty insidious to assume that the "I have a boyfriend" excuse reflects a transient state of self-ownership or somehow kowtows to a patriarchy in which only another male will be respected as a person's significant other, at least enough for some dude to stop offering you a G&T in exchange for a bathroom blow job (or however kids work today). I've seen people at bars who aren't interested simply say that and it works, and I've seen people say "I'm in a relationship" and it's worked. Conversely, I've given out the true "boyfriend" excuse and had it not work at all.
Sometimes we just don't want the other person to feel offended or hurt. Other times, we just don't want to have a 20 minute debate about whether or not we're really interested. If it's a matter of, "Well, people should respect that you're not interested" then GREAT! But people should also not murder, rape, steal from honest workers, or culturally appropriate so I feel like that's gonna be an uphill battle for now. In the meantime, if I want to tell someone that I cannot go home with him or her because I have a boy's head attached to my cooch then let me have my own fun. Keep on keepin' on, everybody.