Well, it probably can’t get any worse.
Work has been a struggle for about 8 months now. Women simply don’t get promoted at my work. All managers are men. New management hires have ALL been men. I haven’t even seen a female applicant for any them.
And myself and the other women just continue to bust our asses and get fucked over. It’s never quite enough to go to HR, but it’s there. And it’s obvious when one of us gets pulled aside for being “emotional” or “having attitude” when the dudes around us do the exact same thing and it goes unmentioned. When we get passed over for promotion because “we’re not quite there yet” and guys that haven’t worked there as long as us or do as much as us get promoted. When the managers shoot the shit with the guys for 5-10 minutes about sports or guns or cars or dude shit (tm) but come over to hush one of us if we are speaking with a coworker about something fun.
So, myself and a (female) coworker got specifically told that we weren’t qualified for a position because the applicant needed to have (a) specific skill set and (b) exception people skills such that the person could just hit the ground running and knock all sorts of shit out.
SURPRISE SURPRISE they promoted one of the guys in my office. Great fit for the culture, ya know?
Well, said person was complaining to me about how hard the (a) skill set was and how they just didn’t have it yet. I pulled them aside for a private discussion. This is someone I’ve previously discussed sexism in the workplace with, and they had really good responses to me (the “just because I haven’t experienced it or seen it doesn’t mean I don’t believe you” sort of answers. the kind where you believe this person is an ally.) While I explained that I thought this person would do fine at this position, I pointed out that myself and other coworker were actively discouraged from this position and why. Of course, I should have kept my fucking mouth shut. This person now thinks I am saying they can’t do their job, and they are one of my managers. SMART MOVE brighersideoflife! Real fucking smooth!
Hahahahah. Sob. I get it. Easier to believe that there was no advantage when applying. Easier to assume I was criticizing their ability to do this job that understand that my point was about corporate culture. I just feel so disheartened. This was a person that I thought understood what our frustrations were, but when I pointed out a specific example it became about them as opposed to the environment.
That’s the pisser. I do believe this person will be able to do this job well. I don’t doubt it. But why the different requirements for them applying versus me? And now I get to keep seeing this individual who thinks I am criticizing their ability to do their job, when it’s not really about them at all.
Well, work was already a struggle, so I don’t think it will get any worse because of this. I hope not, I can’t really take much more.