I figure I owe you guys a bit of an update. Please note I will be bragging about my PPD. You have been warned.

The big bird and I got into a big fight the night of the EPIC SHITSTORM that happened here. That ended up being upsetting of course but it was a good distraction. I had a place to redirect my anger that wasn’t going to affect my real life. In a way I guess I should be thankful for that. Although now I'm wary of sharing vulnerabilities but fuck it. I want to talk about the aftermath of our argument.

It went the way it normally does. We get extremely angry with each other, we say things we don’t mean, we don’t talk for a bit, we realize “geez we’re assholes,” and then we end up acting like adults. We’re working on it. Perpetually but habits are hard to break. So as usual a couple hours after the fight he looks at me and says “What time do you want me back on Sunday?” And we’re back in business. He had his selfish moment and then figured out what he was really asking of me. He’s on his way there now and I feel much more calm than I expected to. In roughly 3 hours I will pick her up from daycare. She’s usually in bed by 8pm so that’s only a couple hours with her. Then tomorrow we’re off to my hometown to visit my g’ma. She’s so excited to see the peep. On Sunday my MIL is taking her for a few hours and then the big bird should be home late afternoon. I’m really glad he is going. He needed this.

So I can do this. Right? At least I know I’ll have you GT (and a giant bottle of red moscato in my fridge for when baby goes to bed). I think I most scared of dealing with her at night for whatever reason. I just have this fear she won't sleep for me.

Update: SHES ASLEEEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was perfect. My dad wanted to facetime after I gave her her bottle and she drifted off to sleep while my dad and I talked a bit. She even rolled over for him! She's getting really good at it. She went right to sleep after I put her down.

So do you think I should crack open the wine tonight? Or only drink tomorrow night?