I have a very fancy wedding to attend tomorrow. It’s at a fancy hotel downtown and it’s a black tie deal. I rented a dress from Rent the Runway that was supposed to arrive by now. It hasn’t, and the cut off for UPS delivery is in 10 minutes. I have combed through my closet, there’s nothing formal enough for this wedding that I can find. I went to get my hair touched up earlier as I routinely do every few months. Either the stylist and I miscommunicated or she made some kind of error in color mixing because my whole head is burnt yellow and orange save for three inches of my super grey streaky roots that took NO color whatsoever. I’m running out at the crack of dawn to get it fixed tomorrow.

I have to be at the church for the wedding mass at 2pm tomorrow. Please tell me that it’s going to be okay. I’m on the verge of hyperventilating.

I know I’ll survive, this isn’t my wedding, but jesus christ if the universe could throw me a bone it would be SO APPRECIATED.