I have a friend. She is constantly late. She is capable of being on time (I have seen it) but whenever we have a rehearsal, she’s at least 15 minutes late. Everytime.
And I finally lost it.
Over the past several weeks, she’s been wanting sympathy for losing two (dance) practice partners (going from two to zero - she has to find new ones). One of the main reasons the partners cited was that she was constantly late. And she is upset that they stopped the partnership because they didn’t talk to her about it before severing the partnership.
I have a troupe with her that we choreograph for. Unless she is already at the studio, she is always late. And even if she is at the studio, she needs to eat-have a coffee-take a break (she works there as the office manager for 4 hours per day) before our practice. Instead of scheduling the practice with this in mind , or eating beforehand, she always makes us wait.
The last straw came yesterday. I work out in the suburbs, the studio where we rehearse is downtown - a 45 minute commute for me on a good day. She wanted to reschedule our practice from the previous agreed upon time on Thursday because she forgot she had another commitment, so I said I could make it for 2pm (I finish at 1pm on Fridays), so we could practice from 2-3. Her office hours start at three.
I rush from work, get there at 1:55. I don’t have keys to the studio, so I’m sitting, waiting in the stairwell. I get a text at 1:59: “Running a bit behind” - I reply asking for a timeline, since I’m already waiting - at 2:10 I get another text: “10 minutes away - friend is giving me a ride from “restaurant” “really sorry that you have to wait”. She went and had brunch with a friend and couldn’t bother being on-time for our practice. By the time she would get there, change, and get started, it would be at least 2:30. So she got the response: “That’s 20 minutes later from when we agreed to meet. Seriously, WTF Sherri*? I’m going home. I’ll be back to the studio for the teacher training at 6:30pm. We can talk about this afterward”. She sent me a text that said our meeting time “wasn’t an ideal situation”. No, you are inconsiderate and need to start being on-time. FYI I have had this discussion with her before - that she needs to be on time. It happened after she was an hour late for a practice a few months ago - she lost track of time while at a friends house during a clothing swap. However, she left and went home before the training ended, so we didn’t talk about what happened.
I’m seriously considering backing out of the project with her and branching out on my own with others (it was my project initially, that she wanted to be a part of). We’re good friends and it’s fun to perform something we created, but she’s hit my last nerve. I can’t work with someone who doesn’t respect my time and considering that she seems to take zero responsibility for her tardiness, I don’t think it’s going to change soon...
It also doesn’t help that I’m the kind of person who is 5 min early for everything... sigh
It also doesn’t help that other meetings I had this week ran late because of peoples tardiness.