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Teachers, Soothe Me

I am a touch more than 6 weeks away from student teaching for elementary school.

I have not been placed at a school yet, but my placement specialist assures me that is normal and I am trying not to freak out about that (I am a big planner and I like to have my crap together.)

Should I be worried that my handwriting has turned to crap since I became computer-dependent in my teens? If so, how can I improve my penmanship?

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Actually, my main anxiety is that I am afraid that I won’t be able to be “on” for a full school day. I feel like I am not quite the person I was before I took care of my dad and watched him die. I’ve always been a pretty cheerful person and I am still trying to find my new normal setting, after 5 months. I feel a bit darker. I am worried that I won’t be able to project the confidence and optimism needed for the job.

How do I fake it?

God damn it, I was upset that I had to postpone this from August and I still feel like it creeped up on me out of nowhere.

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