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That awkward moment . . .

When you find out most of your family thinks you are as worthless as you tend to feel. (blahblahnomainpage, bleepblorptriggerwarning):

Went to work today, and my relative told me that she'd talked to my uncle about me, and well, let's just say he had no kind words for me. Some key highlights include calling my college education "a waste" (didn't pick the 'right" majors), and calling me "crazy" (apparently he knows about my depression/anxiety, probably because my mother won't shut up about it, and she has called me crazy to my face more than once). Oh, and lazy, was very big on mentioning how lazy I was given that I've been unemployed for so long (I've talked about this in previous posts). According to him, and some of my other relatives, including my mother, it's like I don't want a job, like I am purposely bombing interviews left and right because I don't want to work. I mean, I kind of already knew how these people felt about me, and it wasn't some big surprise, but it still hurts to know my own family thinks this about me. I have a hard enough time hauling myself out of bed every morning, and to hear these people tell it, I shouldn't bother cause I suck at life anyway.

So, basically I feel like crap. This shit is not helping my depression AT ALL. I would like to just quit at life, but suicide is far too hurty for me to go anywhere near. So I'm just going to sit here and get fat off these sour jellybeans.

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