Beware, there lies ahead a dump what may be constructed as humble-bragging (/just plain bragging) and the ensuing anxiety. You have been warned.
Friday was one of those days where everything was briefly and gloriously perfect. I found out that my favorite professor has selected me for her department's award. My old boss/now mentor sent my resume and recommended me to someone who might want to actually hire me post-grad for a real job, in my field that's extremely competitive, in my home city that I love and is not NYC. It was my college's 100 days to graduation party and I looked damn hot in a dress that I would have been too intimidated to wear a year ago. I got a boy's phone number whom I've only ever exchanged glances with and never really talked to much before. IT WAS GREAT. HOW DID ALL OF THAT HAPPEN IN 36 HOURS?? (Time extended to count the wee hours of Saturday morning and the late ones on Thursday.)
But now....ACK. Anxiety continues in list order:
1. Apparently you're not supposed to know about the award until the ceremony, and I've already told people! What if they take it away from me for drunkenly telling all of my friends? (I was only informed about this secrecy clause today by someone who isn't a professor, so it's probably nothing. Yet the stomach guilt continues.)
2. My old boss told me this guy would call me sometime "soon". When is "soon"? What if it doesn't happen - at what point should I email him, or her? It was implied that he might need help over spring break if the phone call went well, and that's in March, so...timing? He's probably already found someone perfect to hire who isn't still in college.
3. Boy and I texted a bit that night, it was a little flirtatious, but now what do I say? I go to one of those really intense really small liberal arts schools where there's drunken hook ups, relationships that are basically marriage, or weird friendships that are a combination of the previous two. I've never even *heard* of just randomly asking someone out on a date when you don't already know them. (It says something that when I use tinder over the summers, I find it refreshingly honest and simple.) Do I text him, does he text me? I'd wait until the weekend but it's fucking Valentine's Day.
For anyone who knows me in real life - hi! Oodles of identifying information here!