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So I still don't have a voice. Actually, I have even LESS of a voice, since I don't even have a whisper anymore. My throat feels all tight and burny right where my larynx is. Tomorrow, the Rat Husband will call my GP and get that referral for the ENT doc, and then we are going to go to my work and see if I can take a week of FMLA leave. The paperwork posted at work talks about being able to use certain kinds of paid leave instead of unpaid leave, so I'm going to see if I qualify and if I can use some of my vacation time. I've certainly got plenty. Aside from going to the doctor and telling work I'm not able to work, I dunno what else to do.

Not being able to talk is really messing with me, guys. Seriously, I can't even LAUGH. I can fake it by shaking and slapping my thigh, but it doesn't feel the same at all. That emotional response just isn't quite right. I can't talk to my husband without writing or typing stuff, I can't answer my phone, I can't talk to ANYONE. UGH. I've been getting real depressed, here.

I tried to work on Tuesday, was all "if there's coverage maybe I could stay in the back." YEAH THAT DIDN'T WORK AT ALL. I made it all worse, and I think that's fucked up my throat more. Which is why I had to call out again on Wednesday. That's why I'm going to try the leave thing. Part of the online posting talks about who's qualified, and while regular colds and flus aren't, it talks about being incapacitated and stuff, and that's pretty much me. I can't do my job like this, I can't even whisper to people, and writing it down isn't really a viable option in retail. And the staying-in-the-back thing isn't viable, either, cause there's too much too do and not enough people to basically cover my ass all the time and make sure I don't have to talk to people. It's not feasible.

I really hope they let me take leave, and I desperately hope the ENT can help. I have no idea what this is, anymore. Can allergies really fuck up a throat this much? All the other times I have lost my voice cause of allergies it has come back right away no matter how awful bad I was at not talking. This is the sore throat of the damned.