After I told ex and my mom that a move wasn’t happening next week, they each separately sent me texts within minutes of each other pretty much saying the same thing. They were sorry, they thought I was on board, blah blah. Then ex forwards me a text from my mom saying how sad she is and how I’m in the driver’s seat and that they won’t see the kids for a long time. I had enough and I sent them a group text: Please stop texting each other. It is making things worse. You have stressed me out to the point of tears. I am not dragging my feet because I’m selfish. I have never once said that the girls can’t move there, I have never threatened to keep them from anyone. This is an enormous life decision that needs to happen with at least weeks of additional planning and should involve me from the very beginning.

Today I remembered that last week my mom told me she wouldn’t want my ex in their house when she wasn’t there. I asked how it went from not trusting him alone to allowing him to live there. I told her I was afraid her desire to have her grandkids close to her was causing her to underestimate how bad it could be to live with my ex long term. I said I thought it was a legitimate question that needed to be answered so we’d know this had been completely thought through. Her response: I’m not going to do this. Just talk it over with your friends [info she got from ex]. I’ve said I’m sorry and there is nothing more I can do.

She is now refusing to answer my calls or my texts, although they show as read. This is insanity.