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The sadness of ending relationships


Well, I finally did it. No, not break up with the Professor. No, that's something I would never do/would only do if and when Ewan Macgregor finally responds to my letters/paintings/poorly photoshopped pornography.


HOWEVER. A long time ago I signed up to play a video game that I had to pay every month for because I like the intellectual property it was based on. I got the video game, played it, and while there were some good times I discovered that I didn't like it enough to keep it up and promptly proceeded to stop playing it.

I did not, however, cancel my monthly subscription to it and for the last 14 months or so it's been taunting me on my monthly credit card statement. 12 dollars a month down the drain. The cost of 6 extra large Earl Greys or, I guess, 12 small Earl Greys(but who can live on that little caffeine for 12 days straight? Witches, that's who). "Cancel the game," the Professor would say, "You're just wasting money that could go to supporting me and my juice habit" or something along those lines. I generally stop listening after the first few seconds once I realize that he's not proposing sex.


But I couldn't! Sure, I didn't play the game but every time I meant to I thought...well, sure, I don't play the game now but who knows what tomorrow will bring? Maybe I'll want to play the game again. Maybe they'll release new content that will make the game fun. Maybe society will completely collapse and our space-related video game skills will be the one true currency of the future. What would happen then? Then I'd be cold and shivering, trying to roast the rat I'd caught with my bare hands on the tiny fire I'd managed to start in the barren wastelands while the intellgentsia who hadn't cancelled their video game accounts lounged in futuristic luxury. Then I'd have to band the Rat-People together in a futile attempt to storm the gates of their 21st century Marseilles and probably be vaporized by one of the laser cannons expertly aimed by the Smarties who are good at aiming lasers BECAUSE THEY KEPT PLAYING THE GAME!

I don't know why but I've always been like this. I kept my old gym membership on my credit card for 6 months after I had joined a new gym that was newer, cleaner and nearer to my house. Why? Because shut up, that's why.


But I did it. I bit the bullet and cancelled something and now I'm feeling melancholy. Nathan, Wanya, Shawn, Michael....take me home:

Anyways....anyone else have similarly ridiculous stories of being unable to stop doing/paying for things they don't need/use?

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