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The Unwanted Houseguest, Volume 4

The Grocery Bill is PAID. The Unwanted House Guest (UHG) didn't actually comment on it, but left (nearly all) the cash on the rad cover in the front hallway at some point before morning.


I didn't really see her last night due to an overwhelming amount of work that dropped on me after a blissful day communing with y'all on GT. I sequestered myself in my office and let her fend for herself.

Here's what happened while I was working:

  1. She heated frozen pizza directly on the rack in the oven, leaving a great deal of burnt cheese on the element.
  2. Put more laundry in the main basket. I need to talk to her about this tonight - she has a basket, a pair of hands and a human brain (allegedly) - she can do her own laundry.
  3. Asked Mr. Beaver to turn off the news so she could study. WHAT?? GO IN YOUR ROOM YOU LOSER, THE DINING ROOM IS *OUR* SCHOOLROOM WHEN NO ONE IS DINING IN IT, NOT YOURS. To his credit, Mr. Beaver just flicked off the news and silently went upstairs - laying another brick in his potential wall of GTFO, LADY.

This morning, I got up and skipped as usual, did my school prep, skulked around in the kitchen and made myself some tea. Which is when I realized UHG wasn't actually in the downstairs bathroom - she was still asleep. At 7am - the time she's supposed to leave for work.

What to do? Well, thus far she's essentially behaved like a recalcitrant 15 y/o, so what does one do with those? One loudly knocks on their doors, and wakes them THE FUCK UP. However, this is not my child, and I am not actually responsible for her.


ehehehehehe. It's quite fun to let someone oversleep - who knew?

But it's a joy that lasts only for a few minutes because... She wakes up at 7.20, and is visibly pissed at me for not waking her up sooner. However, in the words of SmallBeaver (and Mercutio), "By my heel, I care not."


Tonight should be interesting - I wonder if I'll be called on the carpet for not waking her sooner!

In the meantime, let's play a game! Name The Feature Film Of The UHG Saga - since all of this sounds only slightly less likely than the plot of Sharknado. If interested, please submit your suggestions in the comments!

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