Things I Can Definitely Blame on PMS

Having an extra half cup size in my poor, swollen, H-cup boobs.

Getting more visibly irritated than usual at dumb people doing stupid shit. Like, finally as irritated as they deserve.

ALMOST buying $700 season tickets to the symphony even though I have like $7 until April 1 (I stopped at the order form page).

After weeks of good, whole foods, a lunch that consists of a bag of Cheetos, a bag of Doritos, and a Starbucks Doubleshot Energy Mocha.

Shopping for puppies even though I most definitely can't handle a puppy right now.

Getting so pissed about being the only one in my department handling all of the stupid user BS that I spent 10 minutes Photoshopping Vladimir Putin riding a bear out of the Goatse butt. (If you don't know what Goatse is, DO NOT GOOGLE IT. Stay innocent.)

What do you do a week before Shark Week that you find disturbing, somewhat funny, and/or a little insane?