Welcome To The Bitchery
Welcome To The Bitchery

1. My parents feel the need to stuff everyone and everything with food and drink.

In laws, dogs, strangers walking by, people on beach blankets next to us. Everyone should feel like an Anaconda that has eaten some sort of elk, apparently.


2. Thought to be teetotalers, my husband's parents just haven't been exposed to good liquor.

We've been through 5 pitchers of caipirinhas, 3 6 packs of beer, 4 bottles of port and 4 of wine. His dad has taken to just sitting there and breaking out into song.


3. Everyone loves torresmo.

Pork belly FTW!

4. My mother in laws meddling hasn't felt intrusive because my mom's the same.

Guess who spent an hour trying to cross stitch sandwiched between two women insisting that only they could properly do it?


5. Mini golf sucks.

You have to wait. And if people suck, you're stuck. Why did a Jinx have to get stuck between overly PDAying teenagers and a grandpa with 7 kids who he seemed to hate? I come from meddling stock! There were a few reminders about appropriate behaviour.


6. I'm not pregnant.

I am the proud mama to uterine cramps that have sent me to bed, though.

7. I married a dork.

Not only did he whine until I agreed to a bike for two ride, try to "woosh" me over incoming waves, and challenge me to a sand castle building contest, he's so insanely happy to have everyone together that his face may break.


8.Buzzfeed lists that have an incredibly sappy ending might actually have a point.

I'm probably going to do this next year as well.

How's everyone else's weekend?

Share This Story

Get our newsletter