Burt: OH SHIT. Check out my fortune!

LoniManderson: What does it say?

Burt: "You are destined to become successful in the field of computer technology." HA!

LoniManderson: What the hell kind of fortune is that? Where did you get this Chinese food from, DeVry University?

Burt: This is a sign!!!

LoniManderson: Oh no. Not this again. No, no.

Burt: I AM GOING TO BE A HACKER!

LoniManderson: Oh god. Please, can we not start this again.

Burt: Dude. I am going to hack on the Internet. This cookie has foretold it so. This is out of my hands now.

Advertisement

LoniManderson: You start this every month. You always think you're going to be a 'hacker' and 'bring down your enemies.' Your enemies usually being people who you think cut you in line at Whataburger. Or me.

Burt: Don't forget the Franklin Mint. They will get what's coming to them, just wait.

LoniManderson: And then every time, I have to remind you how painfully clueless you are with computer technology. Or anything that plugs into an electrical outlet.

Advertisement

Burt: The cookie says otherwise.

LoniManderson: Last week you cried because you couldn't get iTunes to play your Scooby Doo episodes on repeat.

Burt: Whatever! Don't be jealous of my awesome hacker careering launch! MAYBE I WILL HACK YOU, BUDDY.

Advertisement

LoniManderson: Yesterday you said your computer was 'broken' because you couldn't get your 'Cannonball Run' wallpaper to show up. You yelled at the screen for 45 minutes. You told me to throw it in the trash and never speak to you of technology ever again.

Burt: ...

LoniManderson: But you. You're going to be. A hacker.

Burt: I REFER YOU TO THE COOKIE.

LoniManderson: We are never ordering Chinese food ever again.

(via Drink, Curse, Screw)