..has both his front flippers on my chair with his dog nose in my face. He just wants to talk. Also, he loves snotty tissues and all paper towels that live on my desk. He will do a drive by and snatch them with his giant teeth. If he sees one and can't get it, he yips at the back of my head until I move it to where he can snatch it. He constantly drops his ball in a place where he could easily retrieve it if he wasn't so dumbly polite, resulting in the most tragic of crying. He lays under my desk and kisses my feet, too. ETA: He also slurps my WINE!

My lovable asshole. What lovable assholery do your familiars visit upon you?