Welcome To The Bitchery
Welcome To The Bitchery

After you all (so kindly) confirmed my new role as GroupThink Flute Sensation, I've discovered some new information.

I am, to my great shock, a misogynistic white dude. Mainpage commenters assure me of it, so it must be true.

I'm sure that you all have feelings about this. Feelings of disappointment. Feelings of betrayal. Feelings of ... sexual arousal? No? A girl's ... I mean, I dudebro's gotta try.

If you feel the need to impeach me as your resident GroupThink Flute Sensation, I understand. (Who are we kidding? I'm a misogynist. This is all YOUR fault, somehow!)

Also ... will someone help me figure out how to find my guy parts? I've had a list of things I'd do with a penis, should I ever find myself one, and since I'm a misogynist white guy, I figure now is the time to make lemonade out of my anti-feminist lemons.

Illustration for article titled This Just in: Im a Misogynistic White Dude

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