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Geneva- Leaders representing all major religions and various secular humanist, political and scientific organizations have released a collective statement after meeting for several days: Pancakes are officially the work of The Devil.

"I don't even believe in Satan, but I'm fairly confident in the pure evil of pancakes," Richard Dawkins was quoted as saying.


"Countless millenia of evolution has led to a perfectly designed breakfast food," Neil DeGrasse Tyson added, "and it is clearly the waffle."

Nodding in agreement, The Archbishop of Canterbury said "pancakes suck."

Update: Dame Jane Goodall has been quoted as saying that even chimpanzees prefer waffles; "They would rather starve than have pancakes." Judith Butler expressed her belief that pancakes "are a tool of the patriarchy. In a sole dissenting voice, Camille Paglia declared "pancakes represent the full glory of masculine endeavor. If women ruled the world, all we would have are waffles."

It could not be confirmed at this time, but there are unsourced reports that the United Nations Security Counsel is considering "serious sanctions" against the International House of Pancakes.

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