I just spent a VERY long time on that Homewrecker website Kate wrote about. Probably too long, but I had three states to look through. Do you know what it's like to hold your breath for close to an hour? I most certainly had a panic attack, and feel like vomiting.
I did not find myself, thank Cheesus. But it's so terrifying thinking your picture could be on a website like that, with your name and location. Was what I did wrong? Most definitely. Did I know he was married? Not for a year and a half! As soon as I found out, I left. But I still to this day don't know if she ever found out. I don't know her, and I honestly don't want to. It's a sick feeling that lives in the pit of my stomach almost all the time. I can't believe I was 'that girl'. I understand now the anger the wife/girlfriend feels, but I doubt few people understand or care about the shame, and humiliation felt by the Homewrecker, as they're calling it. Knowing that you could unwillingly play a part in something and have it end up online like that makes my blood run cold and my whole body shiver. Sometimes, we truly don't know he's not single. Men are just as much to blame, if not more. But look at how much easier it is to call out the harlot, the dirty, disgusting slut who stole my man from me. That's always been the go-to response, and it's painful. I'm crying for these women and for the fact that their lives are ruined if anyone does a cursory Google search on them. It certainly can't heal the pain of a wife/girlfriend to do something like that, and so it just perpetuates the cycle of female abuse that we heap on each other every day.
This article made my heart hurt, and all the shame come rushing back. It's like a wound, I thought closed, has been reopened and displayed for all to see. I foresee a crying myself to sleep venture this evening.