BoyHeathen and I were at the grocery store today, for the dinner time things because after the discussion of spicy foods I decided we needed fruity spicy wings soon. (So mango habanero, blackberry chipotle and pineapple ghost pepper. Because yes and yummm)

and we always stop to peek at the Redbox. Who knows, something great might be hiding in there!

We stumbled upon a movie, with a title and description so baffling- I refuse to google it because I don’t want the magic to be lost:

A deputy whose mission is protecting the threatened grizzly bear suddenly finds himself conflicted when a massive rogue grizzly wreaks havoc on a local Alaskan community. Enlisting the help of his estranged brother, he enters the labyrinthine Grizzly Maze to track down his missing wife before the bear does.

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Yes my friends- “Into the Grizzly Maze” Now, the sensible, adult part of me insists it is a “The Grey” knock off with bears, or maybe like “The Edge” (which had bears eating Hannibal Lecter and Jack Donaghy I think).

But the title you guys! There is so much possibility! Who would describe just a basic wood full of bears as “labyrinthine”? Did somebody just get over eager with their thesaurus? Maybe it’s a retelling of the Theseus legend with Billy Bob as a crazy Alaskan King Minos (further reinforced by people referring to him as a “cretin” i.e....Cretan- shut up it works) and instead of a horrifying myth monster there is a BEAR. Or maybe it’s about alien super bears who have trapped humans in a maze to break their spirits so they can present them to Alien Bear Children on another planet (for a Twilight Zone like twist!!)

Also, these people are legit semi famous humans. You’ve got Cyclops and Slingblade and Thomas Jane and I can’t remember why I know Piper Perabo, but I totally recognize that name. It’s just a sincerely weird amalgamation of elements in a movie.