So I am randomly FB friends with people from high school still, because apparently I don’t know how to cull my FB friend list. I have been out of high school for 23 years. If I don’t talk to you on the regular now, then I probably give zero fucks about your existence. If I happen across one of their posts that shows they are a garbage human, I unfriend. No biggie.

Well, I get a private FB message from someone who was in my graduating class and is the ex-husband of someone I was really close to in high school. From what I recall, they divorced when he left her for some chick from Canada he met on the internet. Tale as old as time. So once he divorced my friend, I gave zero thoughts to this dude. ZERO. They had no kids together, and she remarried, then sadly died in a car wreck about 4 years ago. So again, I vaugely remember him and he was kind of a tool and then I didn’t like him at all after he left my friend for some internet strange. Cut to today, he sends me a FB message that says, and I quote:

“I want to officially apologize for any creepy behaviour I’ve exhibited towards you,iroqdemic- you never asked for that, and I feel badly that you had to experience it. I hope that you’re having a great week.”

Whut? Like what is he talking about? Sure, he was the creepy dude in the trenchcoat in high school, but I don’t ever remember interacting with him directly. We shared some mutual friends, and that was it. Then when he was married to my friend, every now and then I would see him, but that was maybe like 5 or 6 times, tops. Like, what creepy behavior am I not remembering that he feels so bad about now he has to apologize? WTF is he talking about? Like part of me wants to ask him precisely that, but really I probably don’t want to know if he has internet creeped me or something. Plus he was weird enough back then that I automatically thought of the worst when I read the message. Like, he was weird and gross, maybe he did something I don’t know about that was wildly horrible. I really don’t want to invite him into my life at all in that case. I’ll let the nopetopus answer this message: