I've been hanging out with my girlfriend and one of her close friends, who has three small children. One of them, a girl about 6 or 7 comes up to me and says,

"Can I tell you a secret?"

Me: Sure

"Don't tell anyone."

Me: Okay, what is it?

(whispers) "I love my Daddy more than my boyfriend."

Me: Who's your boyfriend?

"I don't have a boyfriend."

Womp, womp.