Welcome To The Bitchery
Welcome To The Bitchery

Today's Gummi: Haribo Raspberries

Illustration for article titled Todays Gummi: Haribo Raspberries

Greetings, friends of gummi! Early May is a quiet season for regional gummi releases, second only to August in terms of nationwide gummi slowdown, but we here at the Gummi Research Institute™ have managed to catch some late releases from April and put them in our research queue to tide us over during the slow times.


Today's gummi is Haribo Raspberries, an unusual, quirkily-fashioned entry in the gummi oeuvre, about which we have come to some conclusions which, while not entirely scientific, are indeed definitive, namely:

1) there are two distinct flavors here in the gummi berries: one bright and red-raspberryish, one darker and more reminiscent of blackberries. Both are vivid and straightforward, but the distinguishing feature is that the actual nether-gummi is clear and rather neutral, the fruit flavors all coming via the crunchy outer coating;

2) the texture here is really quite innovative, and rather unique among our experiences with the gummi métier—the interior is rather soft, nondescript and lacking in bounceback, but the exterior coating of hard crunchy pellets counterbalances that quite beguilingly. Indeed, texturally it's a bit of a hopeful sport, a blend of characteristics that, individually, are not promising, but somehow manage to work quite well together; and


3) the scrappiness, the persistence, the purity of flavors all manage to transcend the peculiarity in approach and intentional blandness at the core of these gummies. This is a friendly, puppyish little gummi that's pigeon-toed and knock-kneed but wins you over through pure enthusiastic cheerfulness.

Final Gummi Grade: a high B+ for an offbeat little gummi whose whole is far more satisfying than the sum of its parts.

Share This Story

Get our newsletter