There’s a park a few blocks from me where I walk my dogs. It’s a lovely space, large, lots of trees and shade, great play equipment, several pavilions, and there’s usually at least one birthday party each weekend day, today being no exception. Generally this is great—people are nice, and both the dogs and I enjoy watching the festivities as we walk by.

Today, someone setting up a party freaked the fuck out on me for... wait for it... using a park garbage can in sight of the pavilion he was using. He claimed that since he rented one of the pavilions, he “owned” all the garbage cans in the park (he actually claimed the cans were only there because he’d paid for them, which is complete and utter bullshit—I’m in that park 2 or 3 times a day, and the cans are always there).

He got super angry with me—“This is a party! Can’t you see that? How dare you?!” as if I was the one being unreasonable for using a public garbage can in a public park. The can wasn’t even really near “his” goddamn pavilion—he had to come sprinting over to try to stop me, because apparently a tied-off dog poop bag in a can with a lid 50 feet from the party he was having was going to ruin his precious delicate baby’s entire party.

What the fuck is wrong with people? Seriously.