"So if you think meat is murder, dairy is rape, and naked women are fun to look at....this is the place to come to."

First of all: vegan cheese is disgusting. No ifs, ands, or jiggly-yet-perky butts about it.

Second of all: I really want nachos, tho.

Third of all: I love you, Groupthink. I hope you accept this joyous sacrifice.

According to the video below the strip club started as a gimmick to get people to try his vegan cooking (so he wants people to beat their meat, not eat it). His life goal? To "save every creature in the universe from pain and suffering." lololol he works in foodservice* lolololol he runs a strip club** lololol!

Thank you Kumail Nanjiani. thank you, Portlandia. And God Bless America.

This image was lost some time after publication.

Advertisement

*vegan or not, foodservice requires wasting a ton of food and killing a ton of scavengers— Much more than any regular person kills or wastes in their own kitchen. Not trying to hate on all vegan restaurateurs, but that's facts if you want to stay sanitary and in business.

**I'm not faulting the strippers in the least or implying the experience is harmful to all of them, but let's not pretend that anyone's choice to do this operates in a vacuum—least of all his.