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Ways My Body Fucks Me Over: Episode 428

For the last few days, I have woken up every morning with a mild headache. Some caffeine, food, antihistamines, and time cleared it up but not today. Today is my mom's birthday and the day that I got to see my old college roommate/best lady friend and her toddler. It was also the only day left to get Lebanese food, which I can only get here. The headache did not go away.

After mom's birthday dinner, my 4 year old niece wanted to give us a birthday circus show, complete with special appearances by her mom (singing the Mr. Hankey song), and a whole lot of very loud, high pitched noises. It made my headache even worse and I thought I might throw up if I weren't allowed to leave the room, which of course, a 4 year old wouldn't let me do.

Finally, they left. I took an aleve and two tylenol and took a nap. For the next two hours, I woke up every 15 minutes to pee like a racehorse. Then it went down to every 20 minutes and now that I've peed a gallon or two, I feel fine.


I have been drinking more water than usual and my body gave me a headache in thanks. I spent the entire day in pain because of water retention. Fuck you, body, and not in the good way.

Tell me your tales of woe and ludicrous sickness!

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