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Well fuck

Our tortoise died. I am really destroyed over this. I discovered it right as we were wrapping the evening up with our guests and didn't want to make a scene so I just pushed it down and kept cool until I got them out the door. I made LordSparrow go double check for me. We've had her for about 7 years, and she was supposed to live for a long long time. I don't know what happened. I'm going to have to tell Little tomorrow morning and that is going to suck so bad. It's technically her tortoise, a gift from a family friend. I'm going to have to tell him, too. I had to go outside to cry loudly so I didn't wake Little up. I'm so sad and angry and guilty! It's been such a great day until 20 minutes ago. My heart is breaking. She was "just" a tortoise, but she was family. I loved her. A lot. I wasn't as good to her as I could have been, and maybe she'd be alive if I had. We had been planning to build her a beautiful new enclosure. I just don't know what to do with all this emotion at almost 1am.


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