Things people assume about you, and you have no idea what that means or it's so wrong you make funny comments that you should say aloud, but don't.

"You don't seem like a person that would like this experimental French film" (Red, White and Blue trilogy)

Ummmm I'm a video and performance artist... Have you watched any? Because I think your idea of experimental and mine are slightly different.

"You really seem like you should be on a roller derby team."

I don't know what to do with that. I literally have zero info on that.

"I just don't think someone like you would understand the complexities Italian Renaissance."

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I actually teach it, I find it kinda boring. The engineering of the time and military technology is far more interesting.

"Girls like you don't like sci-fi"

You don't even Babylon 5 do you?

"This would be a really hard book for you to read." (I don't remember, it was some mass market thingie like Gone Girl)

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Do you read critical theory for fun? Because I have "A Thousand Plateaus" on my night stand waiting for me to read. I'd name hard narrative books, but honestly I don't care because if you are reading and enjoying it that's cool with me. I didn't know reading was competition.

"You are so uptight."

I know right? The most exciting sex I ever had was when I consensually tied up my ex and beat him. There's something so exciting about hitting someone who wants it and enjoys it. He was a terrible person, but damn when he wasn't abusive and controlling, he was decent sub. If I ever date again, I've love to find another switch who I could actually trust to dominate me...

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Am I making you uncomfortable? ;)