The federal government shut down tonight and who knows what's going to happen, certainly not any of the talking heads on TV, but personally I'm sick of pussy-footing around destroying our country. Let's just jump right into the pool and accept our Mad Max future hellscape.

So, now that every post office has been turned into a butcher shop for human meat and the National Guard are roving gangs of well armed bandits, what will you do for fashion? Leather jacket with an arm ripped off like Fallout? A whimsical clown wig and crown like this Key and Peele skit?

Its not totally original, but I'm going for a mohawk (I can rock it but its kind of frowned upon in the business world). I will wear my ripped up jeans that fit so well but I only get to wear on laundry day, as well as my high school cross country uniform top to show off the ritualized scarring on my arms and chest. Not to brag, but I already have a leg up on the apocalypse, being that I have guns, know how to farm, and have pretty low morals. In movies like The Road, I always saw myself as being in the cannibal gangs rather than the lone wanderers being hunted. Call me a team player.

Anyway, how are you going to rock the death of our country? What will you wear as our cultural institutions burn to ash around us? Are you a home-steader type, or a raider? Do you try to rebuild our ruined system of government, or forge your own with you as Emperor/Empress?