Welcome To The Bitchery

Who will be hatewatching Cowboys/Eagles tonight?

I know, I know, "take it to Deadspin, brodude." But this game has the possibility of being epic for hatewatching. On the one hand, you have the Cowboys, who have managed to make their Cowsheep (phrase borrowed from local sports guy emeritus Randy Gallaway) all cocksure and whatnot by managing to barely squeak out victories against shitty teams. Oh, and their quarterback who manages to be both over- and under-rated at the same time is out, and will be replaced by somebody with the unlikely name of "Orton," who will be backed up by a 41-year-old math teacher who looks like an ogre, but is actually a really great guy since he will be donating his entire game check to the school he teaches at (which I'm sure is not at all influenced by the tax-deductibility of it; it's still a good thing). I consider myself a fair-weather anti-fan of the Cowboys: I want them to win, but I like watching them lose.

On the other side, there are the Eagles. I have had a long day and I hate the fucking Eagles. Like, seriously: I would root for the Christ Punchers against the Eagles. I have to admit, though, that they are an exciting team.

What with my hatred of the Eagles and the Cowboys' propensity for exceptionally crazy things happening, this should be an interesting game.

Share This Story

Get our newsletter