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Welcome To The Bitchery

TW: ladyparts, doctor offices

So this morning I had an appointment for the consult for getting an IUD. Of course the OBGYN office was all “oh you have to have the consult, first.”


So I show up, and they have no record of my appointment. I stay chill, and they say they’ll work me in.

I sit down with the OBGYN about 20 mins later, and explain I want a Mirena, and I know the side effects, etc, after insertion. We talk a few more mins, she gets my history updated, and then she says that I am really low risk for any side effects of insertion, so why not go ahead and just do it today, assuming my insurance covers it.


Naturally, I am onboard. Fuck making that second trip. Insurance covers 100%. They tell me to strip down below the waist and wait on the table. So I do.

About 20 mins goes by. I assume it’s because they fit me in between other patients, so they are just busy.


Doctor and assistant arrives, she gets to work. Insertion is surprisingly painful given what was described. Nothing’s dilated, if you catch my drift.

Anyways, about halfway through I am really hurting, and I make some comment like “this hurts more than expected...” (that clamp on the cervix was getting to me)


Doctor, “you’re doing great. Just think, that Motrin will kick in any second.”

Me, “what Motrin are you speaking of?”

— awkward silent pause —

Doctor to assistant, “did you forget to give her the Motrin 20 minutes ago?”

Assistant, “umm, yes.”

Me, “too late now!!! Finish it up!!!”

And shortly after they were done, I got my Motrin, and then I went to work and finished the day.

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