So I refilled my Ativan prescription over the weekend, because it's nearly impossible to work or function while at a constant state of anxiety. I'm at work now and it has kicked in, and it's always the strangest feeling. I still can acknowledge my anxiety, and it's still there a little bit, but things are...slower. A little calmer and lighter. I think I can actually do this, at least for a few hours.
ETA: nope, still don't know about grad school yet. My therapist and I agreed that I probably wouldn't hear today, and I am officially going to just set my sights on mid-March and assume my notice will come then.