I just got back from my semi-annual dermatologist appointment. I’m usually there for a quick body scan, nothing new, no changes, okay then. Today I wanted a more comprehensive sit-down, starting with the top (my face) and ending at the bottom (my hooves I MEAN FEET).

Everything is fine, mostly. I had a wart frozen off (ouchie, RIP Jeff The Wart), and then I flipped over onto my stomach and the dermo went “...whoa.”

WHAT? WHAAAAT?

Eh, just a “very dark” mole that she decided to remove and is going to biopsy. SUPER! “We’ll call you if we find anything, but if you don’t hear from us, that means you’re fine.” AWESOME.

ANYWAY, we got to talking about my face and the fact that I am 40 goddamned years old and have never, ever, ever had completely clear skin. Maybe for a very brief window on a Thursday with a full moon, but 99.9% of the time, there’s something going on with my face and I am just really sick of it.

Even though it means I get carded for booze ALL THE TIME. I could have worse problems, I suppose.

I’ve been using some hippie-flavor facial scrub on my face (Alba Botanicals Acnedote scrub) and the dermo approved, but she suggested that I try something else to see if maybe that works better. There are plenty of prescription products out there, but I’d rather not deal with that if there’s an OTC situation that would work just as well.

Advertisement

Thus, I throw it out to y’all: what do you wash your lovely faces with and does it make a difference? Do you have a tried-and-true method that you swear by? Do you use something that you kind of hoard in case they discontinue it?

TELL ME YOUR SECRETS, GROUPTHINK.